7 Lap Dance Moves to Make Him Melt

Want to make your guy go gaga? It's not just about what you do in bed that counts. Sure, great sex technique will make you a star in his eyes, but knowing how to tease him will make you a legend. Don't believe us? In The Little Bit Naughty Book of Lap Dancing for Your Lover, real-life exotic dancer Rebecca Drury spills the seven secret -- and really sexy -- steps that work on every guy, every time. You can thank us later.

1- The Grinding Circle
Stand about 60 centimeters (two feet) from your partner, with your feet slightly more than hip-width apart and your toes turned out. With your hips, begin to draw a circle, keeping your back arched. Now slowly bend your knees and grind down as far as is comfortable, then up again, continually undulating your hips and dancing erotically. It's really important to keep your back arched and upright. If you lean forward, you risk impersonating a sumo wrestler.

2- The Turn
Lap dancing is about showing off all your assets, so remember to turn around occasionally. For the best effect, turn slowly -- your lover should barely notice. When you practice, work out which direction is most natural for you to turn in. And don't be overly concerned with how you do it; just take small steps and aim to make the turn blend into and become part of your dance. Keep circling your hips and remember your arm movements. As far as possible, try to keep your lover in your gaze as you turn.

3- The Slap And Tickle
Turn your back to your audience, and with straight legs, bend forward slightly, look back at him coquettishly, and stroke or lightly slap your bottom. I guarantee this will make him smile. Alternatively, still with your back to him, gently sway from your ankles, opening your legs gradually. Slowly bend over so that your bottom is brazenly pointing at your man. Bend one knee to the side and straighten the other out to the other side. Glide your hand up the straight leg and raise your head over the corresponding shoulder to look back at him. Slap your bottom hard. Repeat on the other side.

4- The Lap Dance Grind
Gracefully dance yourself into the triangle made by your lover's open legs, and stand with your back to him and your feet together. Make sure you're as close to the chair as possible. Now bend your knees, keeping your back straight, and gently put your hands on your partner's knees. Lower your bottom toward his lap so that you can just feel his crotch on your skin. Then, keeping your hands on his knees for support, grind down gently, moving your hips in a circular or forward-and-backward motion. Look over your shoulder at your man while you do this, if you can. This is a little tricky, though. Take extra care whenever you go near his groin. If you hurt him, he'll never trust you to dance for him again.

5- The Breast Stroke
Every woman has her own personal scent that collects between her breasts, no matter what size they are or what perfume she wears. It's a potent aphrodisiac. So this step is guaranteed to get your lover going. Move closely into the space between his knees. Standing with your legs straight, gently lean forward and place your hands on either side of the chair. Once you have a firm hold, push your breasts toward his face; his nose should be nestled in your cleavage. For added effect, try brushing from side to side and stroking the end of his nose with your bra or nipple. Keep moving in a provocative way throughout.

6- Knee Strokes
Facing your partner, stand between his legs, as close to the chair as you can. Place your knees in the space between his crotch and the edge of the chair. Gently put slight pressure against his groin with your knees. Lean toward him and blow gently into his ear or on his face. You could even exchange a mouthful of wine with him or pour champagne from your nipples into his mouth. As a variation, try this: Stand up facing your lover, then catch one of his knees between your knees and gently rub up and down his thigh. This is a fabulous sensation; ask him to do it to you sometime.

7- The Body Slide
Standing between your lover's thighs, lean forward and put your hands on the back of the chair for support. Put one knee on each of his thighs, then lift your torso, slide your knees into the space in front of his crotch (careful here!) and slide, slowly, all the way down his body until you're kneeling on the floor in front of him. To get up off the floor, use your lover's knees for support and stand up sexily -- bring your bottom up first, then flick your hair in his face as you raise your upper body.

The Shower Sex You've both been Craving, Especially Him!

1. While he’s washing his chest, stand behind him and press your soaped up boobs against his back. Then reach around and teasingly stroke his upper thighs. All that anticipation combined with the lukewarm water will up his blood flow to his package, meaning he’ll be really (really) turned on.


2. Use a loofah to give him a naughty back massage. Press it firmly against his skin, and move it in slow, small circles from the nape of his neck to the base of his spine...and then keep going so you massage his butt cheeks. The rough texture of the loofah will stimulate all those sensitive nerve endings down there.


3. Stand facing each other so that both of you have one shoulder toward the shower head (but not directly under it). Pull him in for a passionate kiss—having the water spray over both of your faces will add totally new sensations to your lip lock. While you’re at it, give his hair a gentle tug—his scalp is particularly tender right now (in a good way) since he’s been scrubbing it, so it’ll intensify his pleasure.


4. Since the water isn’t piping hot, his nipples will likely be hard and super sensitive. Take advantage by tracing your tongue around the outer edges a few times before (very gently) biting his nipple.


5. Wrap a wet wash cloth around his penis so that it’s touching the underside of his shaft. Then, with your hands holding either end of the washcloth, move it up and down slowly, so it ever-so-lightly rubs the bottom of his penis, creating feel-good friction.


6. Soap up your hands so they’re sudsy, then grab his boys for a little ball-on-ball action (the slickness of the water and soap will increase sensation). Hold them in your hand and move them so they rub against each other. Then move your hand a little further past his balls and stroke the sensitive patch of skin between his twins and his butt with your fingers.


7. Without saying a word, get on your knees (use a hand to steady yourself) and take his penis into your mouth. Use your free hand to stroke his shaft as you go up and down in a corkscrew motion. Not only does it feel amazing for him, it’s way easier for you since the shower water helps to make things super slippery and pleasurable.


8. As you’re going down on him, grab his butt with your hands and dig in lightly with your nails. The water spraying on his butt, plus your nails against his skin, will put his arousal (and his impending climax) into overdrive.


9. Let him play voyeur and touch yourself. If you have a removable shower head, hold it so that the water hits your clitoris, while your guy stands behind you—his chest against your back (that way he can touch your breasts, kiss your neck, etc.). Don’t have the detachable kind? Tweak the angle of the shower head so the water sprays between your legs. (There won’t be as much water pressure on your hot spot this way, so you may need to give yourself a hand).

6 Sex Mistakes that Men Make

Hey guys, think you know everything there is to know about having sex with women? That erotic encyclopedia you carry around in your head may contain a lot of basic errors and omissions about women's sexuality -- errors that can lead to sex mistakes.


Sex Mistake No.1: You Know What She Wants

Men often make assumptions about what a woman wants based upon what they've done with other women. But women aren't all the same.
"You develop a repertoire as you mature sexually, but you should never assume that what worked for the last person is going to work for this person," Taormino says.
That applies not only to sexual predilections, but also to relationships, she says. "There are women who can have no-strings-attached sex, and women who can get attached very easily, and then everyone in between."


Sex Mistake No. 2: You Have All She Needs

Some women can't have an orgasm with less than 3,000 rpm. No human tongue or fingers can generate that kind of vibration. But men typically think something is wrong if a woman needs a vibrator.
"If the only way that a woman can achieve orgasm is with a vibrator, she's not broken," Taormino says.
Think of a vibrator as your assistant, not your substitute. Many couples use vibrators together. "While you're doing one thing, or two things, the vibrator can be doing something else," Taormino says.


Sex Mistake No. 3: Sex Feels the Same for Men and Women

Paget says there tends to be a "huge disconnect" between men and women in the ways that sex feels good.
"When a man has intercourse with a woman, and his penis goes into her body, that sensation is so off the charts for most men, they cannot imagine that it isn't feeling the same way for her," Paget says. "It couldn't be further from the truth."
The inside of the vagina is probably less sensitive than the outer parts for most women. Also, deep thrusting may not feel so nice on the receiving end. If the penis is too long, "it feels like you're getting punched in the stomach," Paget says. "It makes you feel nauseous."


Sex Mistake No. 4: You Know Your Way Around a Woman's Anatomy

Most guys know generally what a clitoris is and where to find it. That's not to say that they really understand it.
More than 30 years ago, at the start of the "sexual revolution," a best-selling book called the Joy of Sex got Americans hip to the orgasmic importance of the clitoris. But the belief that women must be able to orgasm from vaginal penetration stubbornly persists.
"I still get letters from people who say things like, my wife can't [orgasm] from intercourse unless she has clitoral stimulation -- please help," Taormino says. "I want to write back and say, 'OK, what's the problem?'"
"For the majority of women, it's not going to happen that way," Paget says.
Men also lack information about how to touch it and how sensitive it is, Taormino says.
A touch that's bliss for one woman may feel like nothing special, or may even be painful for someone else. Some prefer indirect stimulation.
How can you find out how she likes to be touched? Try asking her.


Sex Mistake No. 5: Wet = Turned On

Guys sometimes get hung up if a woman doesn't get slippery enough for easy penetration. Don't worry about it.
"I think there's a myth that if you're turned on, you're wet," Taormino says. Not necessarily.
Some women tend to get wetter than others, and how much natural lubrication a woman has can change from day to day. It varies by the phase of her menstrual cycle, and it's subject to influences like stress and medications.


Sex Mistake No. 6: Silence Is Golden

A lot of guys think they should be silent during sex, but unless you speak up, your partner has to guess what's doing it for you and what isn't.
If you're respectful about it, a woman who wants to please you will probably appreciate some directions.
"I'm not saying push her head in your lap," Taormino says. "I think that, 'this is how I like it,' is a very useful conversation to have."

Blowjob: Tips & Tricks.

His sensitive spot

Like a matchstick in every way but size, his penis is ‘hot’ at the top and the rest is his ‘wood’. The head, called the ‘glans’ is his most sensitive part. The corona, the rim or ridge of flesh that makes up the bottom of his head is also very sensitive. Some men can orgasm by having only their head stimulated; others will need a firm touch (hand or mouth) on their shaft too.


The Head Kiss

This move allows you to really focus on that sensitive head. With your lips pursed, kiss the very top of his penis, then slowly allow your lips to open up and you move further down his penis head. Stop just as you reach his corona, squeeze your lips tightly together, then go back to the top.


The Swallow

You can start this in the same way as the Head Kiss, but when you get further down, let your tongue press against the underside of his penis and, taking care to wrap your upper lips around your upper teeth, try swallowing. This should create an amazing suction feeling on his penis head.

The Tongue Push

With him inside your mouth, use your tongue to work the most sensitive part of his penis: his head. Wrap your upper lips over your upper teeth and with your tongue extended out of your mouth, push it upwards and in circular motions. Add pressure with your upper lips too, or insert two fingers so you can massage his head while preventing your teeth from meeting his flesh.
The Twist and Twirl
This is a move to get him excited. Position your mouth over his penis, then swirl your tongue around his penis head one way, then the other. Punctuate your swirls with the occasional full suck, to give him a taste of what is to come, then keep teasing and titillating him with those swirly tongue moves.


The Long Lick

If you want to boost his ego, show him exactly how long his penis is by licking it from the very bottom to the very top repeatedly. This works best if you use your hand as well. Place your hand on the side of the penis furthest from your face, so you’ve got something to push against. Now using the flat of your tongue, lick him from his testicles all the way to the tip of his penis, making sure you apply pressure the entire time.


The Sideways Suck

If his penis was a sweet and juicy corn on the cob, this move is all about you eating him up. Using your hand underneath, again to give you something to push against, put your lips against his penis. Hold your lips so the inside, where it’s moist, is touching his penis and then move up and down him, sucking your lips in and out as you go.


The Soft One

Sometimes it’s great to start a BJ before he’s hard. Take him into your mouth (you’ll have to use your hands, else he’s likely to slip out!) and let his penis lie on top of your tongue. Gently swallow, making sure you don’t let your teeth come into contact with his manhood. Within seconds, your mouth will be full, so be prepared!


Make some noise!

Humming or just ‘mmming’ while you’re going down will add an extra sensation to the experience for him. It’ll also make him feel as though you’re loving it – a sure-fire way to make it feel great!

Adding Lube

Spit is a great natural lubricant but it dries out far too quickly, so give yourself a break and invest in some tasty lube to help your blowjob efforts work more smoothly.


Using hands

Hands are indispensable when it comes to fellatio, they supply the pressure that often your tongue and lips can’t – but because you’re using them in combination with your tongue and lips, he gets to enjoy the softness and moistness he so loves. The easiest way to use your hands is simply to grip him around the shaft and place your mouth at the top. Now move your hands in time with your mouth, so that to him, it all feels like one movement. Be warned: this is a fast-track route to ejaculation!

Now, Have fun & try it out.. I'm sure he won't mind a bit!

13 Sex-Drive Killers!

Sex-Drive Killer: Stress
You may be the kind of person who does many things well when under stress. But feeling sexy isn't likely to be one of them. Job stress, money troubles, caring for a sick family member, and other stressors can decrease libido. To keep your stress levels in check, learn helpful stress management techniques or seek the advice of a counselor or doctor.

Sex-Drive Killer: Unresolved Issues
Unresolved relationship problems are one of the most common killers of sex drive. For women in particular, emotional closeness is a major ingredient in sexual desire. Simmering arguments, poor communication, betrayal of trust, and other barriers to intimacy can steer your sex drive off the road.

Sex-Drive Killer: Alcohol
A drink or two doesn't always put you in the mood. Alcohol famously makes you feel less inhibited about sex. But it can also numb your sex drive. And even if it doesn't numb your sex drive, inebriation can be a turn-off for your partner. All of this goes for recreational drugs, too.

Sex-Drive Killer: Too Little Sleep
If your sexual get-up-and-go is gone, maybe you're getting up too early or getting to bed too late. Or maybe you have insomnia or sleep apnea. Whatever it is that's interfering with your sleep, it's also interfering with your sex drive. Too little sleep creates fatigue. Fatigue saps sex drive.

Sex-Drive Killer: Parenting
Parenting itself doesn't kill sex drive. But it can be hard to find time to be intimate when the kids are under foot. Hire a baby sitter for some time to nurture your relationship. New baby in the home? Try scheduling sex during the baby's nap time.

Sex-Drive Killer: Medication
Drugs commonly linked to libido loss include:
Antidepressants
Blood pressure medications
Antihistamines
Oral contraceptives (some studies show a link; others don't)
Chemotherapy
Anti-HIV drugs
Finasteride
Synthetic progesterone-medroxyprogesterone
Changing to a different medication or different dosage may solve the problem. Other drugs may affect sex drive, too. If your sex drive shifted into park soon after beginning a new medication, talk with your doctor. Never stop taking a medication without consulting your doctor.
Sex Drive Killer: Poor Body Image
It's hard to feel sexy if your self-esteem suffers from poor body image. For example, feeling ashamed of being too heavy (even if you’re not) will douse your love light. If your partner has these feelings, it can really help to reassure him or her that you still find him/her sexy. And there's a flip side to the equation: Working out not only enhances your self-esteem, but also ups your sex drive.

Sex-Drive Killer: Obesity
Being overweight or obese is linked to a lack of sexual enjoyment, desire, and difficulties with sexual performance. The reason isn't clear, but may be linked to self-esteem, unsatisfactory relationships, social stigma, and other psychological issues.
Sex-Drive Killer: Erectile Dysfunction
Erectile dysfunction (ED) is a different kind of sexual disorder than loss of libido (a medical term for loss of sex drive). But men with ED worry about how they will be able to perform sexually. And that worry can drain their sex drive.

Sex-Drive Killer: Low T
Testosterone increases sex drive. As men age, their testosterone levels may decline slightly. Not all men lose the desire for sex when their testosterone levels drop -- but many do. Testosterone is linked to sex drive in women, too. But a woman's hormonal balance is more complex than a man's. It's not clear whether testosterone therapy is as safe and effective in boosting sex drive for women as it is for men.

Sex-Drive Killer: Depression
It doesn't seem fair. Many antidepressants can lower your sex drive -- and so does depression. But if your sex drive has drooped, is might be a sign that you're depressed. Clinical depression is a serious, but treatable condition.

Sex-Drive Killer: Menopause
About half of women report reduced sex drive around the time of menopause, even though they believe it important to maintain an active sex life. Menopausal symptoms, such as vaginal dryness and pain during sex, may make sex less comfortable. But the hormonal changes of menopause are only part of the picture. An aging woman concerned about her sex drive should also consider the quality of her relationship, her body image and self esteem, medications she is taking, and her physical health.
Sex-Drive Killer: Too Little Intimacy
Sex without intimacy is a sex-drive killer. Intimacy isn't just a code word for sex. If your sex life is in neutral, try spending more non-sexual intimate time together -- alone. Talk, snuggle, trade massages. Learn to express affection without having to have sex. As intimacy builds, so does sex drive.

How To Give A Good Blowjob

The time will come in your relationship when oral sex will be brought up. In fact, if one partner is a guy, you can almost guarantee it. If he's been giving a woman head and wants some for himself, you might want to think about reciprocating. If you're new to oral sex and are a little shy about it, here are some tips to get you through the first time. Chances are that you won't hurt him, if that's what you're worried about.

The best plan for this is communication! Talk to him, tell him you're unsure as to how to do this, and he'll probably be more than happy to guide you. Remember, practice makes perfect!

Getting in the mood

Ladies, make sure he understands that when it comes to blowjobs, mood is everything. Soft lighting, candles, all of this plays a part in you being in the mood to go down on him. Why? Because it's relaxing, and neither one of you are going to have any fun if you're not relaxed. Start by taking a bath together, if you can find a tub big enough. If not, take a shower. This will ensure that you're both smelling fresh, too. For some, giving head is a form of foreplay. If oral sex is the height of tonight's romp, however, start with another type of foreplay by licking, tickling, touching, tasting, and massaging. You want to get excited, and enjoy this as much as he will.

Start with your hand

Have him lean back against some pillows or sit on the edge of the bed or a chair. He's a guy; it's going to feel good even if you have him dangling upside down on a light post. This position is for your comfort. Stroke him, gently (very gently) squeezing his balls and then releasing. Think of them as stress balls, but don't squeeze so hard. Ask if you're unsure; check with him about how he wants you to hold his cock. The point of this exercise is to get him as hot as possible before you even use your mouth. The more excited he is, the less time oral sex will take, and if he's the type to go all night in other positions, you're going to want this to be over before morning. This is not because you're not having a good time, it's because giving head can be exhausting for a woman.

The tip of the penis and the base of the shaft are the two spots that you want to concentrate on when using your hand. Let your fingertips nibble for you at first. A very light touch, almost floating above the skin, is very tantric and exciting. If you take his hand and guide it to your clit, you can get him even more excited. When you're ready to use your mouth, the "69" position can be best to start with. He's getting excited, you're getting relaxed, and having you on top in the sixty nine position is by far the most comfortable for having that much cock in your throat. The angles of your throat and his penis will match much better in this position. Having him on top can make the blowjob a littler hard to control, so if this worries you, stay on top of him!

Go for the Throat

Now that he's hot and you're relaxed, you can take him in your mouth. Start with just your lips, and roll your tongue over the head of his penis. You can do this pretty much as long as you want, especially if you're still a little nervous. You don't want to hurt him, but you can't physically do this all night, it will cause your jaw and neck to hurt after awhile.

Start slow and take as much of him into your throat as you can; stop and back off if you need to. Use the back of your tongue in a swallowing motion and run your tongue around the shaft of the cock as you swallow. Pull back out and start sucking on him like he was a Popsicle, he will love it. Suck as hard as you want unless he indicates that he needs you to stop. Alternate the lips, tongue, and throat to bring him to climax. And ladies, try to swallow. His cum won't hurt you and if he's been expecting oral sex, hopefully he's been drinking fruit juice, it adds natural sugars to the semen and makes it taste better. Either way, spitting and then jumping up to brush your teeth will ruin the mood.

If you need help and he takes too long, use your hands as well as your mouth - the added stimulation may be just what he needs.

The secret to good oral sex

As much as you want to and love him, we talked about the pain in your neck and jaw. This will happen. The best technique for this to be as comfortable for as long as possible is to grab your jaw at the base and squeeze it with one hand. This relieves the pressure on the muscles around the jaw and will allow you to go longer. (This is another reason for soft lighting. If it's dark he probably won't notice what you are doing.)To take the pressure off your neck, as before, the "69" position is best for giving guys head.

The secret to not having to have his cock in your throat for an extended amount of time is to get him as hot as possible before you give him head. If you've already had sex tonight and he's cum once, forget giving head, unless you want it to take hours. If he's ready to burst before you even go down on him, it will still be pleasurable for both of you but you won't end up sore. Hot foreplay with sex toys are great for this purpose, especially if he's not expecting it. Give him a surprise and visit your local sex toy or adult bookstore alone to pick out something fun before the evening.

In Training

You can also train your lips, throat, and tongue. Exercising these muscles will increase stamina and help you feel more confident about giving head. The college students were right, using a banana or a cucumber to lessen your gag reflex really does work.

Start slow practice home alone, of course. Holding your lips in the "O" position for as long as you can and then repeating will strengthen them. You can do this while you're watching T.V. or reading--probably not a good idea while on the way to work using public transportation--or if you're really outgoing, invite a few of your girlfriends over for an exercise party.

Tongue exercises are the same for a girl as they are for a guy, but you won't need to develop yours as much. When guys are giving head, they primarily use the tongue, while women use the throat and lips. A type of tongue isometrics is best for women; hold your tongue curled back for as long as you can as often as you can to strengthen the muscle. You can do this one sitting at your desk at work.

If you follow these basic suggestions; comfort, training, foreplay, and willingness, you will become really good at giving head and he will really appreciate it.

How Yoga Can Improve Your Sex

Sleep on this: You'd have better sex if you were a loose woman. Limbering up with yoga will help you build a strong, supple body — and that leads to a lot more action in the bedroom, says Ellen Barrett, author of Sexy Yoga. "Yoga increases flexibility, which helps you to be free and just go for it in sex," she says. Here are five more reasons you should hit the mat before you hit the sack.

It Helps You Flow
Yoga increases your overall blood flow, and some positions, such as the eagle pose, direct it straight toward your pelvis. When all that blood rushes to your privates, it literally makes you hot. That heat, combined with a Viagra-like stimulation (as the blood swells your button), heightens your sensitivity and increases desire.
Yoga moves that blast belly fat!

It Makes You Stronger Down Below
Yoga tones and strengthens your entire core — which includes your pelvic floor. "The more you work these muscles, the greater range of motion you have," says Becky Jeffers, fitness director at the Berman Center for female sexual health and menopause management in Chicago. "This gives you stronger contractions and releases, which can help you experience a more intense orgasm."

It Breeds Confidence
Quieting your mind and focusing on your breath during a pose help you become more aware of yourself — and your own needs. "When you're present, you know what you need to feel fulfilled by your partner," Jeffers says. "You can then translate and communicate this deeper understanding to your partner during sex." Knowing and expressing your desires will make you feel good — psychologically as well as sexually.

Introducing Sex Toys into a Relationship

Introducing sex toys into a relationship can take both pleasure and intimacy to the next level and then some. In addition, the element of "fun" is brought into the picture, and being in a fun, playful relationship is something few couples truly achieve due to poor communication. With a sex toy, you can easily build a bridge toward fun sexual intimacy. Here are three important ways to bring sex toys into a relationship.

1. Start slow! Remember you're building a bridge and before you can put up the foundation you need to prep the work area. Introducing any outside element into sexual relations can be challenging. The easiest prep tool to use in order to ease into sex toys, are lotions or oils. What you are doing here is simply introducing a third element into your intimate relations, and you're starting with something simple. Once erotic oils and lotions are used, you've opened the door for other intimacy tools to be added in the future.

2. The foundation! You're foundation will set the stage for further sex toy adventures, so it's important to choose the right foundation. What you're looking to do here is to introduce an actual sex toy into the relationship. But it has to be a sex toy which is simple, gentle, and easy. In other words your foundation sex toy shouldn't be some elaborate contraption. You'll easily scare off your partner. Your foundation should be basic and something easy which you can further build upon in the near future. Various ticklers and the like would be an example of a simple foundations to begin building your sex toy adventures around.

3. Avoid the Crutch! You want to avoid becoming sex toy addicted and every intimate encounter having to rely on a sex toy. That is, don't turn a sex toy into a crutch. Use it only to enhance the relationship, not serve as the centerpiece where every intimate encounter is going to require a sex toy in order for pleasure to be achieved.

Sex toys, or intimacy tools, can be used as an automatic bridge to bring one another closer while achieving intimacy on a level never previously experienced.

Okay, So now that you are over the fear of adding a sex toy into your relationship, you might want to know which sex toys are the BEST to start out with! You may want to know where to get them? Well, there is NO BETTER place then Cosmopolitan's favorite Adam & Eve.

Here are a few suggestions we have for starter toys ....

1.) Adam & Eve Water Proof Mini Massager  only $11.95

2.) Fingo's Nubby Finger Vibrator from Adam & Eve only $19.95

  3.)  The I Scream Vibrator at Adam & Eve only  $14.95

All of these toys and hundreds more are available at Adam & Eve. You are sure to find the right toys for you & your partner, or just for yourself ;)